Have you ever asked yourself, “Did I do the right thing” after scolding your children? Even if you have, trust us, this is one of the most common dilemma that every parent goes through. Though we at Dayawati Modi Academy, positioned among the top schools in Meerut, always advise avoiding to scold children too much, we also understand that for you, as parents, it often becomes essential, especially when the kids do something really wrong.  But has it occurred to you that even after scolding, your children may not have realized what wrong they did and that you scolded them for their own benefit only? They are children, after all, and they aren’t adept at realizing the nuances of human emotions or behavior. So, what’s the byproduct of this? Unfortunately, it gives rise to anger and resentment in children.

Now, if you reciprocate the same anger through your words and actions as well, it would only worsen the situation. You know, the problem with anger is that it diminishes a person’s ability to understand what’s right and what’s not. As such, it is quite possible that while scolding them or in a reaction to your child’s anger, you end up saying things that not only you regret later but also negatively impact your child’s tender mind.

There are many things you should never say to an angry child. But there are five that take precedence over the others. Let’s find out what they are:

• “Must I do everything for you?”: Yes, we know, this is one of the most commonly said things that perhaps all parents reading this article must have said to their kids at least once thus far. However, though this may not seem to be a big thing to say, the fact is that this statement may make your child feel horrible and more like a burden to you. This especially holds true when you say so to an angry child. Just imagine, wouldn’t you have felt the same way if you were angry with someone and that specific “someone” said such things to you? Of course, you would’ve felt bad! Remember, your children will love you no matter your imperfections, but when they hear this, they feel their love isn’t reciprocated. It is thus best to avoid saying such things, no matter what the situation is.

• “Do as I say or else…”: This inevitably leads to confrontation at some point. Do you want to threaten your child into doing something, even if it’s the right thing to do? Or would you rather have them do it out of their free will? We’re sure your answer is the latter. When children indulge in an activity willingly, it builds character and teaches them about responsibility at an early age.

However, when you threaten them to do something just because you want them to do it, they fail to understand the logic behind it and are more likely to do the exact opposite of what you are asking them to do, just in a bid to show that they are angry and won’t obey. A better way out is to use a calm tone and make them realize why they must do the task in question and why you’re counting on them to do it. We guarantee that they’ll respect you, treat the task as a responsibility, and go above and beyond to complete it.

• “I’m disappointed in you”: This statement is traumatizing for children of all ages. To hear this being uttered by a parent crushes their self-confidence, and they grow up feeling like a disappointment. Now, if you’ve ever said it, you must be wondering how’s that possible? I was disappointed in just one of their actions! While that’s true, trust us when we say those words are cancerous. They spread their effects until their self-confidence dies a slow death. Thus, instead of saying such things, you should rather teach them why their actions were wrong and why they should never repeat the same.

• “How many times have I told you to…”: When you say this, you’re reinforcing the fact that you nag them. Children never like being nagged, as most kids these days like to be independent. The key here is tactfulness. Manage the situation in such a way that they feel the task is a responsibility to be performed dutifully.

• “My house, my rules!”: While true, you mustn’t paint the picture with such clarity. Why’s that? Well, children don’t like harsh facts! Upon hearing this, they would feel unwanted and that you don’t respect them. You should rather tell them why the rules are in place and how they benefit them as a family.

Parenting is an Experience to be Cherished

We at Dayawati Modi Academy, one of the top schools in Meerut, understand that you know your child better than us, and that’s absolutely true. But we can surely help you in your parenting endeavors owing to the years of experience we hold in mentoring and guiding young minds. We firmly believe that raising a child should plant cherished and unblemished memories that last forever. However, anger is one such emotion that only adds up to negativity. As such, our advice would be to steer clear of letting anger ruin your relationship with your kids. Be calm in the way you approach them. After all, it is the way you manage yourself during challenging situations that will impart them crucial life skills.